Series: Famous Last Words
About Love by John Burke, February 24, 2008

Famous last words… this will be interesting: What were the main ideas that Jesus wanted his disciples to learn before He left? In this message, John explores one of those: What is love. That’s sure something worth learning.

1. In last week’s Second Helpings you started by thinking of a song that had fired you up to change the world. Let’s try that idea again… but his time it will be even easier… a song about love… after all, there must be a million of them. Think of a song about love that was important to you or you really liked for whatever reason. Spend some time talking about “Your Song” (… guess I’ve told you mine), and whatever you’d like to share about why you liked it: i.e., who it makes you think of, when you first heard it, when it was popular, the words, the tune… whatever. (10 minutes)

2. John focused on how Jesus’ teachings on love were completely different from most of the “love” messages we get in our world. As John told us, much of what we learn about love in this world is is based on the idea of attraction because of what someone or something can do for us in some way (the Greek word is Eros.) No surprise, this is NOT the kind of love Jesus focused on. He wanted to talk about the type of love that is about giving not getting… even self-sacrificing when called for. The Greek word for this kind of love is Agape). While Agape-love is not what we hear so much about, most of us have known, or at least have met, someone who shows that kind of love – at least sometimes. Can you think of someone who you know who seems to operate with that sort of love? Think about that person for a minute and then go around the group, say who the person is, and then describe them with other words that “fit” that person (i.e., caring). Keep a list going of the words that describe people who show Agape-type love. (10 minutes)

3. Next, look at the other kind of love. Don’t name names… but think of someone who seems to search for Eros-type love – attraction based on what another does for them. What sort of words describe that individual. Share these word descriptions, keeping a list of those as well. (10 minutes)

4. Now, compare your lists: My bet is that the Agape list looks a LOT more desirable. It’s the paradox John talked about (and Jesus did too): The real blessings come when we give. Have you ever experienced that? If there is sometime when you loved someone with mostly Agape-type love. What did that feel like? Spend some time for those who would like to share any experiences… and particularly what THEY gained from the giving. (10 – 15 minutes)

5. Obviously, if we want all those good qualities and “blessings” all we have to do is show Agape, self-sacrificing love all the time. Uh-oh… one problem: That is HARD. Want to see how hard? Look at the Bible verse below from I Corinthians 13 (4 – 6).

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Do you know anyone besides Jesus… even your “Agape-person” who is like that all the time? So what’s up? Does Jesus REALLY expect us to be like that? In the message, John talked about how it is the Holy Sprit who gives us the ability to love like that. Does anyone have any experience of having God prompt them to show love in a situation where they would not have otherwise. How did that work? Take a few minutes to share about that. (And note the “Next Steps” below for more on John’s messages on how to stay connected to the Holy Spirit and be better able to tap into His Agape-love). (10 minutes)

6. Maybe this message on love has prompted you to think of someone God wants you to show His love to. If so, write down that person’s name and close by asking God to show you how to love more like Him in specific ways. If there is something you need do this week, write that down too. (2 minutes)

Bible verses from the message:
After washing their feet, he put on his robe again and sat down and asked, “Do you understand what I was doing? You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and you are right, because that’s what I am. And since I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet. I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you. I tell you the truth, slaves are not greater than their master. Nor is the messenger more important than the one who sends the message. Now that you know these things, God will bless you for doing them. John 13:12-17

Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he it come from God and was returning to God; so.... John 13:3

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:9-13

God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

Get more (love)... go further:

• To learn more about how to love better and more by staying connected to God, check out the "Holy Who?" messages from last November 11, 18, and 25. You can download or listen at Gateway's Sunday Message Archive. You can WATCH this past Sunday's message at that site too.
• Gateway's Way of Christ on-line resource pages have several ideas for how to grow more in Loving People: Books, videos, and other ideas to build relationships.

Volunteer Request

If you've been enjoying these Second Helpings posts each week, and are looking for a way to help make them more readily available to even more people, please consider the volunteer opportunities below.

• One-time request: We're looking to improve how the Second Helpings discussion questions are integrated with the audio files from the Sunday messages that are posted online. We have an idea for how to do this, and we're looking for a volunteer who can help. It's an easy one-time task that might take a few hours -- and could be done anytime over the next few weeks. No special software required, nor any special skills. If you can copy & paste some links, you can help!
• One-time request: If you enjoy and understand how to adjust the html code in a blogger-style template, you could volunteer to help with a slight cosmetic face-lift for the Second Helpings pages.
• Ongoing request: Finally, I'd love to find a volunteer who can do simple task every week further integrating the Second Helpings topics into other parts of the website. I'm still working out the logistics of this, but it should be a simple task of cutting & pasting links and classifying the content to a particular Way of Christ cateogry. Ideally, I'm looking for someone who regularly attends services at the McNeil campus (or listens online right away when the message is posted), has basic web & communication skills, and who is open to learning from me how to classify resources into the Way of Christ categories (which is pretty simple!). Once trained, this would take less than 10 minutes a week, but will help make the great Second Helpings resources accessible to even more people!

If you're interested in helping with any of these, please email Becky Laswell (becky@gatewaychurch.com). Thanks!

Next: Serve

Series: Next
Serve by Ted Beasley, February 17, 2008

For this conclusion of the Next series, Ted gave us the challenge of making serving one of our next steps, but he also show us that it may not be as hard as we think.

1. Ted opened by talking about some of the music that fired him up when he was young and impressionable… made him want to change the world. Give that a shot in the group: can you think of any song that got you excited about some ideal… or made you think the world was full of possibility? Go around and reminisce a little: what was one of those songs for you? (10 minutes)

2. Naturally, few of us decide to change the world because of a song, but almost all of us at some time or another have some really big dreams about something we could do, but never quite got to the starting block – or started and then ran out of steam early. So, what are some of the reasons we don’t follow through on our good intentions? Take a few minutes to just talk about some of the things that get in the way. (10 minutes)

3. One of the great encouragements of this message (and Jesus’ message), is that we don’t have to do the BIG thing: Doing a small thing is a good thing. Take a look at the last Bible verse below, from Matthew 10. It might be interesting to know that this passage comes at the end of a long speech by Jesus. He is sending the disciples out on a “missionary” journey. He has given them vast power and lots of direction and caution (See the whole chapter of Matthew 10). But at the very end of all that teaching, before He sends His disciples out, He says that a cup of water is enough to be of service. Spend some time talking about what a “cup of water” may have represented during Jesus time, and what it could mean in ours. (10 minutes)

4. As Ted mentioned, Gateway has set up a blog site where you can post your own examples of offering a cup of water in your world. (Click here to check it out.) The purpose is not to pat ourselves on the back, but to give us all encouragement about our impact in the world around us, and to give us all ideas about how we could be serving in our day-to-day lives. Try that in the group. Think for a minute about the last year. Can you think of sometime where you have reached out in a small way to help someone outside your immediate friends and family that showed them that you cared? Go around the group and encourage each other with what is possible. If you share your own experience here, be sure to talk about what YOU gained from the experience… if anything. (10 – 15 minutes)

5. In the message, Ted noted three things that are needed to serve: Live, See, and Love. Try this out on a limited scale. First, pray and ask God to give you fresh eyes to look at others whose lives you cross. Then, think about those intersections, focus on one area, and then try to identify one person who seems to you like they may have a need. Can you think of anyway that you could offer a cup of water? If so, write that down for later thought. If you can’t think of anything right off, then plan to ask God to show a next step if He has one for you with that person. Once you've done that individually, pair off in the group and share what you thought about on this question with a discussion partner. If you have some specific action in mind, be sure to share that, and then plan to come back next time and tell your partner what happened . Also, please take a look at the first "Next Step" below for suggestion by Ted to get an idea about Gateway resources for helping others. (10 minutes)

6. Close by allowing anyone who had an “ah-ha” minute in the paired discussion to share in the larger group. (5 minutes)

Bible verses from the message:
What do you think? There was a man who had two sons. He went to the first and said, “Son, go and work today in the vineyard.” "I will not,” he answered, but later he changed his mind and went. Then the father went to the other son and said the same thing. He answered, “I will, sir,” but he did not go. Which of the two did what his father wanted? Matthew 21: 28-31

You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:14-16

One day Peter and John were going up to the temple at the time of prayer—at three in the afternoon. Now a man who was lame from birth was being carried to the temple gate . . . When he saw Peter and John about to enter, he asked them for money. Peter looked straight at him, as did John . . . Then Peter said, "Silver or gold I do not have, but what I do have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk."
Acts 3: 1 - 6

Then those “goats” are going to say, “Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or homeless or shivering or sick or in prison and didn't help?” He will answer them, “I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you failed to do one of these things to someone who was being overlooked or ignored, that was me—you failed to do it to me.” Matthew 25: 44-45

This is a large work I've called you into, but don't be overwhelmed by it. It's best to start small. Give a cool cup of water to someone who is thirsty, for instance. The smallest act of giving or receiving makes you a true apprentice. You won't lose out on a thing. Matthew 10: 41-42

Next-Step Resources:
To find out what areas of help Gateway has available, check out Gateway Resources. If someone you know needs help (or you do), this may be a way to respond.

To get some ideas about Next Steps for you on your own spiritual journey, take a look at the Gateway Next Steps website. Info here can help you better gauge where you are and where and how to move forward .

To listen to Ted's message "Serve", to review the whole "Next" series - or hear other messages, you can download or listen at Gateway's Sunday Message Archive.

Next: Impact

Could your “Next Step” in growth be to increase your impact on the world around you? This was the theme John developed in the message “Impact”. Jesus said that we are not supposed to hide our “light”. No doubt, showing real care for other people that Jesus loves is part of the way we shine out His light in our lives. In this discussion you can explore different ways to shine on.

1. Start by thinking about the types of “needs” that really punch your button. Assume you were given the job of spending $100,000 on ONE area that would help other people in some way. In what way/area would you spend it? Go around the group and say what you’d choose, and if you can, explain a bit about why that particular area “speaks” to you. (10 – 15 minutes)

2. Most of us are aware of the needs around us, yet we so often don’t respond with personal action. Why is that? Brainstorm in the group and try to keep a list of the things that keep people from acting in response to needs in the world, both those close at hand and those far away. (5 – 10 minutes)

3. Next, try a “cost-benefit analysis” of needs you have responded to. At some point most of us have done something that was intended to help others: Think about just one of these in your life… if there are many, pick one that meant a lot to you. Now, think about what you got out of that (be broad in interpreting this… think of ANY way it was good for you). Get your list of benefits (on paper or in your head) and then in the group, list the benefits. Next, think about the “cost” side of the equation. Usually there are some costs, of some sort (i.e., real financial, or time, or something else). In the one activity you are focusing on here, what were your costs? Take time to go around the group and list the “costs”. Finally, do you have any thoughts about your own “cost-benefit”? (10 – 15 minutes)

4. John noted that God will often make something happen from ‘weakness” With that in mind, try to remember a time when you took on something that seemed like it was more than you could manage, but you did it because you felt like God was directing you or you just knew it was the “right thing to do”? What was the result? Take some time to share any “God working from your weakness” stories in your own life. (10 minutes)

5. Now, turn to Gateway for a minute. For those who heard the message or know about (or have been involved in) Gateway “Community Care” activity, start a list of the ways Gateway acts to meet people’s needs around us – near and far. Next, take a look at the passage below from Acts 1:7-8. Jesus says they are to be his disciples in Jerusalem, in Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the world. Can you draw a parallel between those places at Jesus time, and places in our own world? Talk about what this means today, and then go back to the list of Gateway activities and try to link those up with the “where” categories: Which do you think are “Jerusalem”, which “Judea and Samaria”, and which the “ends of the earth”?(10 – 15 minutes)

6. At this point you've probably done a lot of reflecting on caring for others, our opportunities, the difficulties, and the costs and benefits of following God’s direction to be a light for others. Was there anything that really spoke to you? Take a few minutes to let this settle in, silently and individually. Maybe you should pray right now and ask God whether He has some new role in mind for you. Or maybe you felt something tap you on the heart, and already know where you want to respond – or maybe you are already involved in a helping ministry. Either way, think about any “Next Steps” you think God has in mind for you and then determine at least one thing you can do in the next week to walk that walk. (5 minutes)

Bible Verses from the Message

Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow.
Isaiah 1:17,

The kind of fasting I want calls you to free those who are chained by injustice and to stop oppressing those who work for you. Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter--when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own relatives in need?
Isaiah 58:6-7

Then the righteous will answer him, “Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?” The King will reply, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”
Matthew 25:37-40

You are the light of the world…let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
Matthew 5:13-16

You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.
Acts 1:7-8

There were no needy people among them, because those who owned land or houses would sell them and bring the money to the apostles to give to those in need.
Acts 4:32-35

But as the believers rapidly multiplied, there were rumblings of discontent. The Greek-speaking believers complained about the Hebrew-speaking believers, saying that their widows were being discriminated against in the daily distribution of food.
Acts 6:1

A great famine was coming upon the entire Roman world. (This was fulfilled during the reign of Claudius.) So the believers in Antioch decided to send relief to the brothers and sisters in Judea, everyone giving as much as they could. This they did, entrusting their gifts to Barnabas and Saul to take to the elders of the church in Jerusalem.
Acts 11:28-30

“God knows people’s hearts, and he confirmed that he accepts Gentiles by giving them the Holy Spirit, just as he did to us. He made no distinction between us and them, for he cleansed their hearts through faith. So why are you now challenging God by burdening the Gentile believers with a yoke that neither we nor our ancestors were able to bear? We believe that we are all saved the same way, by the undeserved grace of the Lord Jesus”…James stood and said… “My judgment is that we should not make it difficult for the Gentiles who are turning to God.”
Acts 15:7-11, 13, 19

Get more - go further:

• Consider the questions at the Next Steps site to help you decide where you are on your path.
• Check out connections options at Gateway.
• You can search for related books on-line at the Gateway Bookstore or look for books at the "reality" bookstore in the "Garage".
• Remember - each Sunday's message is available by 5 PM on the day of the message. Past messages are also available for listening and download. Just go to Gateway's Sunday Messages. Free CD's of the messages will be available after the services at Gateway the following Sunday.

Next: Grow

Series: Next
Grow by John Burke, February 3, 2008

In this message, John really jumped into the heart of the “Next” series: Figuring out where you are now in your spiritual journey and then deciding how to take the next step. This discussion/exercise will probably be much more useful for you if you heard the message on Sunday and took a look at the Next Step options in the program (or checked it all out on-line – see links at the end of this blog in our “next steps” section). If you get a chance, take a look before diving into the questions below.

1. In last week’s blog, we closed by asking you which step on the path, you think you might be walking? Today, start back right there. Take a look at the categories below.

Discover: “I’m checking things out. Either I’m not a Christ-follower, or I’ve very recently become one. I have questions, but I want more than easy answers. I want to get to know people and find out what this is really all about. I may be interested in a small group. I may be open to serving. I’m open to learning. Just don’t ask me to do anything weird.”

Develop: “I am a Christ-follower. I want to learn more, especially about developing a more satisfying experience with Christ. I have some experience with spiritual practices like studying Scripture, prayer, and walking with the Spirit, but I need greater consistency. I’d like to have “spiritual running partners” who know my struggles and inspire me to greater depth. From time to time, I slip back into old patterns not consistent with my commitment, and I’d like that to stop. I want to make a difference; I want to learn more about my unique role in the Body of Christ. I genuinely want to follow Christ.”

Deepen: “I have been consistently following Christ for years. I have daily spiritual habits that keep me connected with God’s Spirit and spiritual friends who challenge me to grow. I also have friends who are far from God that I pray for and serve regularly. I still have questions, but I know what I believe and why. I know my God-given purpose and I’m making an impact in the areas of my gifts and passions. Those who know me best would say that I’m becoming more and more of the person that God longs for me to be. My greatest desire is to help others discover, develop, or deepen their own walk with Christ."

Which fits you best? (Take a some time for every person who is comfortable to talk about where they are.) When it’s your turn, try to add some of your own words and experience that help describe where you are now. (Just a reminder: wherever you are, that’s where God loves you. The most important thing is not where you are but where you go next). (15 – 20 minutes)

2. Naturally, we want to look forward, but the next step here will be forward to the past: Where WERE you? Think back 1 month, one year, five years… whichever seems like the best period to catch a different phase in your life. Now think for a minute about what got you from there to where you are now. Write down or note for yourself any things or actions that triggered a next step. Take some time for each person to talk about these, and in a group, try to discuss each step in turn. So first, for those who thought they were in the Discover stage: Did you have a “pre-discover” stage? What got you to “Discover”? After the Discover folks have talked about their previous “next steps”, go on to do the same for Develop and then Deepen. If you can, keep a list of the any common types of events or actions that resulted led to a time of spiritual growth. (15 – 20 minutes)

3. Now, back to the future… you know where you are now, and you’ve considered some things that have created growth in the past for you and for others. What would be a good next step for you? Be sure to consider some of the next steps that are available through Gateway. If anybody in the group looked at the Next Step website, or know of specific opportunities at Gateway, spend some time to describe those. Now, select some options. Pair off. Then take about 5 minutes (each) to tell your discussion partner two or three things you think might be a good next step for you. (15 minutes)

4. Close with some time to decide individually whether there is a next step you want to take. If so, make a commitment about what and how and when you can move forward this week to journey on. Be sure to take a minute to ask the Lord to give you the excitement and the motivation to take the step(s) to move further into life with Him. (2 – 3 minutes)

Bible verses from this message:

I am writing to you, dear children, because your sins have been forgiven on account of his name. I am writing to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I am writing to you, young people, because you have overcome the evil one.
1 John 2:12-13

[Timothy be] nourished by the message of faith and the good teaching you have followed. Do not waste time arguing over godless ideas and old wives’ tales. Instead, train yourself to be godly. “Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come.”
1 Timothy 4:6-8

“Whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
Mark 10:43-45

We have much to say about this, but it is hard to explain because you are slow to learn. In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again.
Heb 5:11-12

Get more - go further:

• Consider the questions at the Next Steps site to help you decide where you are on your path.
• Check out connections options at Gateway.
• You can search for related books on-line at the Gateway Bookstore or look for books at the "reality" bookstore in the "Garage".
• Remember - each Sunday's message is available by 5 PM on the day of the message. Past messages are also available for listening and download. Just go to Gateway's Sunday Messages. Free CD's of the messages will be available after the services at Gateway the following Sunday.